Wednesday, February 22, 2006
woke up at 10 this morning!! cos i had only chi for the 1st period den free until 1210. so i pon chi to get more sleep! yay. attended lessons for 2hrs only. attended guitar after that. guitar is one of the few reasons y i go to sch nowadays. i'll just drag myself to sch on the other weekdays. so sad isnt it? i really dun look forward to lectures n tutorials. but to me.. maths is absolutely neccessary to attend. the others will have to depend on my mood. haha. but i'll most probably go.
praying that wenting's illness is not dengue. she looked super pale this morning. she told me that she's scared that she contracted dengue cos she wun be able to study for her tests nxt wk. guitar has been quite boring without her too. please dun let it be dengue..
to U:
it is coming to an end. we'd probably go our separate ways. it pains me to leave.. perhaps its necessary. i dunno. maybe we'll never noe.. maybe im carrying too much hope.
BEECHed at : 8:08 PM
Monday, February 20, 2006
to all the ppl who i've met in tpjc.. the ppl who r leaving afta 1st 3mths. i may be one of those. i just wanna say all the best to all of you. take care all!
this is for U too..
"Goodbye My Lover"
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to beI've seen you cry,
I've seen you smile.I've watched you sleeping for a while.I'd be the father of your child.I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
BEECHed at : 9:57 PM
Friday, February 17, 2006
went crazy today! i brought an extra set of cedar uni for yiqi at first. den after she changed.. everyone got high n started swapping unis!! i wore the nau chiau uni 1st. i looked super weird. the blouse was small but e skirt was super big n long! angel said i looked like someone frm e past. dun really noe wad she meant though. changed into the st nick's uni after phy tutorial! this time round i looked super guai. buttoned up n everything.. den i tried to be as girly as camilla. as u can tell.. i failed terribily. haha. camilla wore my cedar uni. haha. she looked like some sloppy ah lian.. but still as gu niang as usual. we were walking in those uni at the canteen. guess wad? we met that honeystar. camilla n i just turned n run away!! he is damn irritating. to angel: i wanna noe the content of ur conversation between u n honeystar!! have u told camilla bout it? heehee..
went to tm again wif sis after all her whinning. it was super disgusting. trust me.. u dun wanna noe. haha. she's gonna have a super early b'dae party tmr at raffles town club!! yup.. she went to tm to get her tiara cos she wants to look like a princess or a diva. well.. i'll just try n look like a devil! but no fork n horns.. hmm..
BEECHed at : 10:58 PM
Thursday, February 16, 2006
wore the tpjc uniform today!! it felt weird cos there's no tie. it fits really well!! borrowed frm my ogl. but im kinda worried if she has enough sets of the uniform to wear. din see her today.. so i din manage to ask. she's really nice! she din even hesitate to lend her uniform to me. most of the ppl in sch tot i bought the uniform. haha.. my maths tutor was damn funny. she saw me n had such a big reaction tt she almost fell off e chair. goodness me! she's pregnant!! my CG's getting worried bout her so told her to walk slower than usual to our class. (its really out of pure concern!!) haha. yea.. attracted A LOT of attention today. haha.. yy was saying tt cedar uniform looks betta. duh!! hee.
think im officially in guitar 3. i dont want!! tt grp is super boring.. there r only 3 j1s. mm, connie n me. pathetic. i wanna go guitar 2!! all e fun ppl r dere! yy, meh meh, xiao man, hc, goldi.. the singles club! oh well..
BEECHed at : 6:27 PM
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
its valentine's day again!! this yr i made cookies for almost everyone i noe from tpjc!! all said my cookies tasted great!! yay! the credit actually goes to my supervisor (sis). she stayed up together wif me to bake those cookies! made cards for ppl.. but i didnt haf enough time to make for everyone. so i just randomly chose some ppl to make for. yup. received a lot of chocolates in return. kept eating them while waiting for my guitar president ytd. oh yea.. went 'dating' wif my guitar seniors. 5 of them. all gals. the singles club!! went to e parkway ajisen to have dinner. at first it was awkward but was betta afta that. they're a bunch of funny ppl. glad that i met them.
dun really feel like blogging.
to U:
thanks for being there. bcos of u.. i saw the light at the end of the tunnel. bcos of u.. i decided to be strong. n bcos of u.. im me again. =)
BEECHed at : 9:49 PM
Saturday, February 11, 2006
~disappointed~
finally received my o's results ytd. didnt do well at all. got 12. expected 9. cant make it to SA. let my family down. let my teachers down. let my seniors down. let myself down. cried my eyes out. stopped crying for awhile. went home n cry again. locked myself in room. played guitar. received sms. cried again. i feel dumb. i feel stupid. did below sch's avg. ppl screamed wif joy n jubilance. while i weep in disappointment. ppl frm other schs cnnt understand. 12 is not considered gd in cedar. top scorer comes frm cedar. many got single digit. wad bout me? a mere 12 is not good enough..
went out wif jm b4 the release of o's.watched fun wif dick n jane. dumb movie. pointless. senseless. or mayb bcos i really wasnt in the mood. received msg tt someone failed eng in cedar. tot i was e one. cried after the movie(though it was supposed to be a comedy). but it happened that i wasnt e one who failed.
very grateful to those who stood by me. mom,sis, jm, yy, eve, yz.. thanks. it shows tt im not alone in this world.
BEECHed at : 5:12 PM
Monday, February 06, 2006
went out with OG2 ytd!! it was great man.. watched fearless!! it was quite violent and super bloody. ya literally. but there is a moral behind the story. that is to be sure of a situation before reacting rashly. cherish the moments with e loved ones before everything's too late. yup. after e movie we met up wif joan n en. cos they went to their concert thing.. at 1st we thought our ogl was gonna perform at tampines at around five. so we went to play pool in order to kill time. however her performance thing was at amk!! so far.. so we stayed n went subway for dinner! i had a really wonderful time ytd!! thanks OG2!! love ya all!
today's a really long day.. had all e crap lessons n had guitar. guitar was gr8 as usual! i finally have my very own guitar!! ahh! after long years of waiting.. yay! my guitar is super cool! super shiny! super new! im gonna call it my 'husband'. haha..
had a mini chat wif YY today during guitar practice (ya im a slacker). she was asking me if im staying in tpjc. when i answered that i wanna go somewhere else.. her smile faded immediately. n she got quite sad. den she told me tt she doesnt want to see our friendship wither away.. n wished me all e best to get into my dream jc. honestly.. i was surprised bout how much she cared.~dear YY: even if i get into another jc.. we can still meet up ya? dun worry.. i believe this friendship can last! have faith!~ n meh meh!!! she was like "bijun's leaving? bijun's leaving?!" haha.. she's really funny. abi hugged me n said "i dunno when i can see u again!!". jeremy's a nice guy. he gave me e guitar tabs for one last breath! thanks my dear seniors. it really means a lot to me. but hey! who noes if im gonna stay? haha. but anyway.. i love u all to bits!!
BEECHed at : 7:56 PM
Sunday, February 05, 2006
~Here Without You- 3 Doors Down~
A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face
I'm here without you
babyBut you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me
The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me
Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it wont take away my
loveAnd when the last
one falls
When it's all said and done
It gets hard but it wont take away my love
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me
im so in love with this song.. if only someone would sing this song to me.. haha! i wish ah! currently learning how to play this on guitar. think will take very long to master the whole song. but i'll perservere!! yeah!
BEECHed at : 8:02 PM
Saturday, February 04, 2006
today(fri) was a short day. had 3 lessons only. cos we got thrown out of the geog lecture by ms ---. she was upset with the fact that so many ponned sch last fri. sorry but i dun regret ponning sch. she might tell me to move on in life.. but as a human, i am unable to forget all e teachers who stood side by side with me through one of e darkest period of my life. i cant explain how grateful i am. she said that my teachers wld be so disappointed if dey knew i ponned sch to visit them. but on the contrary.. they were more than happy to see us. to ms ---: no offense. but u r not my cedar teacher. so stop pretending that u know everything.
went to crash srjc after sch! met tty n she showed me around. that place has a much hingher celing than tpjc. the library is more spacious. BUT the canteen is small. it looks like a typical hawker center.. the signboard has chinese words on it. not bcos its cny. no. its to translate e stall's name directly from eng to chi. and.. the hall has no air-con!! i wonder how ppl do their a-levels there..
went to orchard to watch chingay!! met up with chris n her fren! didnt see her for a loooong time. we walked down the road just to look for our sector. took really long to get dere. frm taka to centrepoint. sat down at the roadside. chingay has a lot of dance performances!! i love e hip-hop performance!! its so full of energy! i wanna learn hip-hop too! den the parade began. 1st was the SOKA thing. didnt know my ogl is part of SOKA. didnt manage to spot her.. dey were wearing costumes that hid their faces. so we just shouted her name. unfortunately.. no reply. mayb she didnt notice me. but we were e only ones who stood up n we made a lot of noise. oh wells.. the rest of e parade was fun. i wld have stayed longer if it didnt end that late. too bad the preview didnt include e party. i wanna party n go crazy!! woohoo!
BEECHed at : 12:58 AM
Thursday, February 02, 2006
its cny again!! but this year's one is somehow not as exciting.. i think its cos of all the travelling and stuff. i dun really like it. i mean.. its good to see my relatives again. but we r not as close anymore. sad. esp my dad's side. we had gathering on sat(cny eve) for tuan yuan fan(reunion dinner). its was so damn boring. everyone kinda gave me a weird look that made me feel uneasy n awkward. in my mind i was like 'what the heck am i doing here?'. it just didnt feel right when im with them. however.. things r completely different when im with the relatives of my mom's side. i just love the kids!! maybe im just a born baby-sitter. haha
i think most of you will be astonished, shocked, taken aback, surprised wadeva when u read this.. i wore a skirt. i wore a skirt!! can u believe it? i wore skirts on cny!! as u can see.. i hate wearing skirts. i dunno y but i hate wearing them. even my sch skirt. haha. i just cannot be demure.
CNY day1
went to temple n pray. paid respects for my grandparents n uncle. prayed for my o'levels. prayed for good health... prayed to get more ang pao money! haha! just kidding.. have not opened them up yet!! but i do hope i can get lots of money! heehee. im money-faced. had mian xian at the guang ming hill temple. simple but yummy. den more visiting..
day2
went to auntie's place. stoned for awhile. watched tv. left the place n the visiting continues.
okay this is getting nowhere. i basically went to visit, get ang pao=) , eat, stone and sleep during cny. boring. feel like going to chingay to support my ogl n guitar senior. but i have no tickets!! sigh.. maybe i'll just watch it on tv.
BEECHed at : 5:14 PM